While the family and I were on vacation to Maryland to stay with C's aunt and uncle, the four of us took a "vacation within a vacation" to Bethany Beach, Delaware. Overall, it was a great time. The boys enjoyed their first ever trip to a beach, C got a needed break from her family (and especially her family's friend) and I got to relish all that W, S and C experienced.
Before I go into what I came here to write about this trip, I must preface this by offering a quick W story. On our first morning at Bethany Beach, W had a MAJOR tantrum/breakdown. He wanted Starbucks for breakfast. When C and I told him that we were having (FREE!!!!!) breakfast at the hotel and that we weren't driving to Starbucks (we didn't even know where one was), W started crying, screaming, stomping, pounding, etc. I was able to calm him down a bit, so I took him and S to the restaurant in the hotel to eat breakfast. I got the boys their food, sat down to cut everything up for them and was about to go get myself food when W starting crying again. He wanted an Everything Bagel. The hotel didn't have Everything Bagels. W did not quite grasp this. The crying, and being loud and repeatedly asking "go to Starbucks!" and "I want any Everything Bagel!" reappeared. A few minutes later C came to join us, but ended up taking W back to our hotel room with her. S and I trailed behind. Anywho, I know I said this would be a quick W story, so to wrap things up, W threw about an hour-and-a-half to two an hour long temper tantrum over Starbucks Everything Bagels. This was the type of tantrum in which nothing would make W better. We (and then just I because C took S out to the beach) just had to wait it out.
So, to what I really wanted to get across... the next day W, S and I were back at breakfast again. W was in a much better mood (he didn't want a Starbucks Bagel this morning. He was happy with his waffle, bacon and bowl of dry Froot Loops). S, on the other hand, threw a tantrum because I told him I had to help him with his cup of cranberry juice (he had to use a regular plastic cup because I forgot his sippy cup in our room). So, here's another breakfast with a toddle crying, screaming and being loud. S's tantrum didn't last nearly as long as W's, but it still wasn't fun.
After S calmed down and C returned to the room to finish getting ready, I took W and S to go do a craft. The three of us cut through the food area to refill their drinks (C had brought S's sippy cup with her when she met up with us for breakfast). While we were waiting in line for cranberry juice, a lady next to us commented on how cute the boys were (I'm by no means bragging, but C and I do hear this a lot from strangers about the boys 😊) But then she offered this: "I saw you with the boys at your table. You did a great job. You were so patient with your little one. It brought back memories of when my children were that age."
That was extremely nice of her to say. C and I both really appreciate when people come up to us and tell as that we're doing a great job parenting, especially when the boys are being difficult. But I have to admit, that when I was saying "thank you" to the lady, what was really going through my mind was, "of course I have to be patient, lady. Losing my temper or yelling at S wouldn't calm him down at all."
I am a very patient person. I'm good at staying calm. This isn't to say that I never get upset, mad, annoyed or impatient. But I do think I do a good job of realizing when losing my temper/patience can hurt a situation rather than help it.
I am a teacher. I am a middle school teacher. I am a special education middle school teacher. If there was ever a profession that required a tremendous amount of patience, it would be the job in which I'm currently employed. I've gone off on students before. Some kids have a way of trying to elicit that battle from you. That's something I always try to keep in mind when things might get heated within the classroom. Each time that I have yelled at a student, I've made it a point to personally apologize to the student for losing my temper.
One thing I'm not sure people understand is just how stressful my job can be. I know... the same could be said for every job. I make it a point to leave "home stuff" at home and "school stuff" at school. It's not fair to C and the boys if I bring my stressful day at work home with me. Likewise, it's not fair to my students if I bring my stressful day/night at home to school with me.
Some of the stress comes from the fact that some of my middle school students behavior similarly to W and S, who are 4 and 2, respectfully. It can be difficult some days to spend a whole day at work with adolescents who act like toddlers, and then come home to two toddlers at a time which I like to call the "witching hour." The "witching hour" involves tantrums, hunger, but not wanting to eat, tiredness, but it's too late for a nap, but too early for bed (when you combine the hunger with the tiredness, you get a term C and I like call "hangry"), lack of sharing, lack of independent play, lack of anything close to rational thought. But at least this is expected of toddlers.
Well, if I haven't already started rambling, I feel a ramble coming on. My intention wasn't to complain, even if it sounds like I did. My intention was to just get whoever might be reading this to reflect on the value of patience.
And this is by no means targeted at anybody specific!!!!!
Anywho, off to go make dinner. I found a new recipe I'm going to try tonight for C and the boys. It's grilled pineapple chicken. I hope they all like it! Since this is the first time I will have made it, everyone is going to need a little patience...
A
The Bed
On Wednesday, I assembled my youngest son's new bed. He had outgrown his crib and was ready for his new "big boy" bed. We actually had the bed for a few weeks prior to putting it together, but C and I decided it would be best to wait until after we returned from Europe to assemble it and have S (our youngest son) sleep in it. W (our oldest son) and S stayed at my parents house while C and I were in Europe; since S would be sleeping in a crib at my parents' house, we didn't want him to get used to a regular bed only to got back into a crib while we were gone.
Anywho, after I put the bed together (with the assistance of my little helpers, W and S), I texted C. She said she was trying to find some motivation while at work, so I sent her a picture of S's new bed, with full bedding on it.
Her reply surprised me. She wrote, "Oh my! I might cry." When I asked her why, she wrote, "There has been a crib in my house for 5 years. ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜"
I understand her reaction. Our boys are growing up. Each day they become a little less dependent on mommy and daddy. The bond between a mother and her children is immensely special and unique. Carrying a child for close to a year is a tremendous responsibility and requires a great amount of sacrifices, many of which C probably never (nor ever will) made known to me. A mother seeing her babies grow up must be filled with many emotions: happiness, wonder, awe, sadness, regret, excitement, loss... love.
As a father, I'm torn about this transition, but most likely not to the extent C is. I was looking forward to this day. I was excited for S to get his new bed. I was curious to see how he would take to it (so far he's taken it to really well). When I was taking down his crib, I did not feel the sadness that C expressed to me in her message. To me, this was just another early transition in S's life.
However, there is a part of me that wants W and S to stay this age forever. Despite my longing for my sons to develop their independence, there is a part of me that enjoys just how much they need me and C. I admit to being a hypocrite. I suppose every parent does, to some extent. But every day both W and S amaze me. Every day W and S allow me to see the world through their eyes: innocent, honest, curious, unbelievable, or as S likes to describe it, "Holy Moley, Macaroni!!!!!" I want to hold onto these days as long as I can, yet I want them to grow, learn, love and flourish.
Soon enough C and I will no longer be mommy and daddy. We'll be mom and dad. And then what??? At least there will always be a bed in our house for them to sleep in.
A
Anywho, after I put the bed together (with the assistance of my little helpers, W and S), I texted C. She said she was trying to find some motivation while at work, so I sent her a picture of S's new bed, with full bedding on it.
Her reply surprised me. She wrote, "Oh my! I might cry." When I asked her why, she wrote, "There has been a crib in my house for 5 years. ðŸ˜ðŸ˜ðŸ˜"
I understand her reaction. Our boys are growing up. Each day they become a little less dependent on mommy and daddy. The bond between a mother and her children is immensely special and unique. Carrying a child for close to a year is a tremendous responsibility and requires a great amount of sacrifices, many of which C probably never (nor ever will) made known to me. A mother seeing her babies grow up must be filled with many emotions: happiness, wonder, awe, sadness, regret, excitement, loss... love.
As a father, I'm torn about this transition, but most likely not to the extent C is. I was looking forward to this day. I was excited for S to get his new bed. I was curious to see how he would take to it (so far he's taken it to really well). When I was taking down his crib, I did not feel the sadness that C expressed to me in her message. To me, this was just another early transition in S's life.
However, there is a part of me that wants W and S to stay this age forever. Despite my longing for my sons to develop their independence, there is a part of me that enjoys just how much they need me and C. I admit to being a hypocrite. I suppose every parent does, to some extent. But every day both W and S amaze me. Every day W and S allow me to see the world through their eyes: innocent, honest, curious, unbelievable, or as S likes to describe it, "Holy Moley, Macaroni!!!!!" I want to hold onto these days as long as I can, yet I want them to grow, learn, love and flourish.
Soon enough C and I will no longer be mommy and daddy. We'll be mom and dad. And then what??? At least there will always be a bed in our house for them to sleep in.
A
4th of July
For a good number of people in this country, this year's 4th of July was the final day of a four day weekend. For C and I, it was the finale of a five day span that ran the gamut of emotions.
I won't go into detail, but we laughed, cried, got angry, got happy, felt exhausted, felt relieved.
The 4th of July isn't necessarily my favorite holiday. As a history major and a Social Studies teacher I appreciate the history of the holiday, but I don't really go for all of the celebrations and festivities that occur during the day (and night).
First, I do not enjoy parades. Never have. I don't understand why people sit on the side of a road and watch wave after wave of strangers walk by. However, the boys' preschool had a float in this year's parade. Last year I did not accompany C, her mom and the boys in the parade. This year, however, I did. And despite the warm weather, I enjoyed it. I got to pull the wagon the boys were riding in the entire duration of the parade. C was very sweet and offered numerous times to take over, but I wouldn't let her. It's not that I think the physical, manual labor is a man's job (I did let her pull the wagon on the walk back to the car). It's just that with having CF, sometimes I need to feel that I can do things without limitations, breaks or assistance. Pulling that wagon was something I needed to do to prove that I'm healthy. And honestly, the only thing that bothered me while pulling the wagon in the parade was the sweat that got in my eyes.
Second, I do not enjoy fireworks. Well, let me get a little more specific... I do not enjoy fireworks after my kids have gone to bed and I especially do not like fireworks after 10:00 at night... and after 11:00 at night. So for the past few nights, I've had a little difficulty falling asleep because fireworks have been blasting off in our neighborhood. Does it make me a bad person for hoping the people who shoot off fireworks in the neighborhood late at night also blow off a couple of their fingers???
Anywho, 4th of July weekend 2017 was a really good one. C and I talked about it briefly (hey-we were both tired) in bed that night. C summed it best when she said, "it ended great."
Don't forget- if you're reading this and follow C's blog, don't tell her about it. Her birthday is one month away!
I saw that she posted a 4th of July recap earlier today. Haven't read it yet. Didn't want to let it sway my thoughts and writing. But now that I'm done with my post, Westy Side Story here I come!!!
Oh- I called in a favor that night too with the Big Guy. We'll see in about a month if He comes through.
A
I won't go into detail, but we laughed, cried, got angry, got happy, felt exhausted, felt relieved.
The 4th of July isn't necessarily my favorite holiday. As a history major and a Social Studies teacher I appreciate the history of the holiday, but I don't really go for all of the celebrations and festivities that occur during the day (and night).
First, I do not enjoy parades. Never have. I don't understand why people sit on the side of a road and watch wave after wave of strangers walk by. However, the boys' preschool had a float in this year's parade. Last year I did not accompany C, her mom and the boys in the parade. This year, however, I did. And despite the warm weather, I enjoyed it. I got to pull the wagon the boys were riding in the entire duration of the parade. C was very sweet and offered numerous times to take over, but I wouldn't let her. It's not that I think the physical, manual labor is a man's job (I did let her pull the wagon on the walk back to the car). It's just that with having CF, sometimes I need to feel that I can do things without limitations, breaks or assistance. Pulling that wagon was something I needed to do to prove that I'm healthy. And honestly, the only thing that bothered me while pulling the wagon in the parade was the sweat that got in my eyes.
Second, I do not enjoy fireworks. Well, let me get a little more specific... I do not enjoy fireworks after my kids have gone to bed and I especially do not like fireworks after 10:00 at night... and after 11:00 at night. So for the past few nights, I've had a little difficulty falling asleep because fireworks have been blasting off in our neighborhood. Does it make me a bad person for hoping the people who shoot off fireworks in the neighborhood late at night also blow off a couple of their fingers???
Anywho, 4th of July weekend 2017 was a really good one. C and I talked about it briefly (hey-we were both tired) in bed that night. C summed it best when she said, "it ended great."
Don't forget- if you're reading this and follow C's blog, don't tell her about it. Her birthday is one month away!
I saw that she posted a 4th of July recap earlier today. Haven't read it yet. Didn't want to let it sway my thoughts and writing. But now that I'm done with my post, Westy Side Story here I come!!!
Oh- I called in a favor that night too with the Big Guy. We'll see in about a month if He comes through.
A
Inblogeral
Hello.
This is my inaugural blog. I like to call it my "Inblogeral." Yeah... bad jokes and puns are something I like to do.
Anyways, why have I started a blog? Hmm... right now it's to talk to other adults, I guess. I'm a teacher, so summertimes have been daddy time for the past four years. I get to spend my summers raising our two boys. They are wonderful children, and I love them more than I thought I ever could, but sometimes I just get tired of the same topics of conversation- garbage cans, garbage trucks, garbage, air conditioners, car makes/models. And the questions... the endless barrage of questions!!!! At home, on walks, in the car, in the bathroom. Wherever and whenever, there are always questions thrown in my direction. But I really shouldn't complain about this. Asking questions is actually my oldest son's greatest attribute (I wanted to write this sentence as "asking questions is one of my oldest son's greatest attributes. But does that make it sound like I have more than one oldest son??? Stuff like that goes through my mind all of the time). But why can't there be a pause button on those rapid-fire questions!!!???!!!
The best thing that gets me through these summer days are texts from my wife while she's at work. It's that little dose of adult contact that arrives at various intervals that helps remind me that I'm not stranded alone with my sons. In fact, it's really because of my wife that I'm writing this blog...
Some of you might now her as C from "Westy Side Story." That's her blog. I've been mentioned in a post or two. I binge-read her posts. Even though I've lived through all of her posts, I love reading a shared event through her perspective. This blog will now give her the opportunity to read an event through my point of view, and maybe discover something new about me (or us) just as I have about her. More about C at another time, but I need to share this... you know they old cliche "he's out-kicked his coverage"? That's how I view my marriage to C. I don't know why she chose me, but I'm glad she did! She's incredibly smart, compassionately kindhearted, and warm-your-heart funny. But above all, beautiful. Physically beautiful of course (tell her that and she'll deny it). But everything about her is beautiful- mind, body and soul. I loved this wonderful lady the first time I saw her, I loved her on our horrible first date, I loved her on our wedding day. But I love her more today.
So this is a way to communicate to the non-kid world out there. Even if no one reads it, I'm going to think at least one person does.
I'm not quite sure how often I'll add a post. And I'm not really sure what I'll be writing about. I guess like you, I'll just have to wait and see.
Oh, and if by chance any of you who are reading this also reads C's blog, please don't tell her about my blog. I'm going to wait until her birthday next month to tell her about it.
A.
This is my inaugural blog. I like to call it my "Inblogeral." Yeah... bad jokes and puns are something I like to do.
Anyways, why have I started a blog? Hmm... right now it's to talk to other adults, I guess. I'm a teacher, so summertimes have been daddy time for the past four years. I get to spend my summers raising our two boys. They are wonderful children, and I love them more than I thought I ever could, but sometimes I just get tired of the same topics of conversation- garbage cans, garbage trucks, garbage, air conditioners, car makes/models. And the questions... the endless barrage of questions!!!! At home, on walks, in the car, in the bathroom. Wherever and whenever, there are always questions thrown in my direction. But I really shouldn't complain about this. Asking questions is actually my oldest son's greatest attribute (I wanted to write this sentence as "asking questions is one of my oldest son's greatest attributes. But does that make it sound like I have more than one oldest son??? Stuff like that goes through my mind all of the time). But why can't there be a pause button on those rapid-fire questions!!!???!!!
The best thing that gets me through these summer days are texts from my wife while she's at work. It's that little dose of adult contact that arrives at various intervals that helps remind me that I'm not stranded alone with my sons. In fact, it's really because of my wife that I'm writing this blog...
Some of you might now her as C from "Westy Side Story." That's her blog. I've been mentioned in a post or two. I binge-read her posts. Even though I've lived through all of her posts, I love reading a shared event through her perspective. This blog will now give her the opportunity to read an event through my point of view, and maybe discover something new about me (or us) just as I have about her. More about C at another time, but I need to share this... you know they old cliche "he's out-kicked his coverage"? That's how I view my marriage to C. I don't know why she chose me, but I'm glad she did! She's incredibly smart, compassionately kindhearted, and warm-your-heart funny. But above all, beautiful. Physically beautiful of course (tell her that and she'll deny it). But everything about her is beautiful- mind, body and soul. I loved this wonderful lady the first time I saw her, I loved her on our horrible first date, I loved her on our wedding day. But I love her more today.
So this is a way to communicate to the non-kid world out there. Even if no one reads it, I'm going to think at least one person does.
I'm not quite sure how often I'll add a post. And I'm not really sure what I'll be writing about. I guess like you, I'll just have to wait and see.
Oh, and if by chance any of you who are reading this also reads C's blog, please don't tell her about my blog. I'm going to wait until her birthday next month to tell her about it.
A.
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